... the journey will continue!

Greetings friends and fans ...

Back in May of 2009 I wrote my first post as an introduction to what this blog would be all about. It was not only my personal feelings about drama, but also a bit of an explanation about melodrama itself - it's art, it's purpose, and it's ultimate message to the viewer through exaggerated plots and deeply engaging characters that appeal directly to the emotional roots in most healthy people. In the year that I really stopped watching and writing on Asian drama, a great many things happened in my life that derailed, unraveled, and at the same time intrigued me. The level of drama in my own life this past year has easily rivaled some of the best fictional drama I've ever watched. I have spent a lot of time in the past few months thinking about how to begin writing again because while my appreciation of the art of melodrama hasn't changed, my feelings specifically about Asian drama definitely have.

The one consistent issue I have written on in this blog is communication - both verbal and non-verbal. The most obvious reason for that being that it's my area of expertise as a behavioral therapist and it's something I have written about, lectured on, and taught classes on for many years. Communication as an art, communication as a science, communication as modern hieroglyphs ... and on and on. For me, communication is the end all-be all of issues in the world we live in, with the power to destroy en masse communities, individuals, and whole countries. Without the ability to communicate with one another can you imagine what this world would be like? It is the single most important aspect to human existence and development but yet the most undervalued, misunderstood, and misused.

I find, in general, that as somewhat of an expert on communication, I have trouble communicating with almost EVERYONE regardless of culture simply because 90% of the population have a very limited understanding of what communication actually is and how to do it effectively let alone clearly. As a result I happen to be, for most people, a difficult person to communicate with. The main reason for this is because communication for most people is a vague series of grunts, assumptions, illogical connections, and selfishness and I communicate ... well, differently. It annoys people - especially the few Asians that I have known. In my limited social experience with Asians, I have found that healthy communication has been nearly impossible and mostly for similar reasons despite the major differences in all of their respective cultures - Chinese, Filipino, and Korean. Masking, saving face, communication crush, and communication subjugation are all aspects of both Korean and Japanese expression. That's kind of a contradiction actually ... the use of the word expression. An expression is "any complete communicable thought (or emotion) formed in accord with the requirements of a language". But if the accorded requirements of a given language are more focused on repression then how can a complete communicable thought or emotion be formed? It can't or it would be incomplete at best. The KYMSAS (Keep Your Mouth Shut And Suffer) factor of Asian communication has been something that I have debated about up and down and back and forth with the KTHM (Korean That Hates Me). While both she and I have similar backgrounds growing up and in our choice of career and schools of psychological study, we have amazingly different ways of communicating that have resulted in almost an impossible relationship for the past two and a half years.

Communication in Asian culture is ... undeniably unique. While there are many positive features of communication in Japanese and Korean culture that frankly most Americans need to take cues from, there are also some horribly negative aspects to how each one discourages it. These negative aspects of both verbal and non-verbal communication have been the subject of a lot of cultural studies and, in addition to other aspects of Asian culture, have been cited as contributing factors to the continued - and rising - cases of psychological disturbance and instability in both cultures. In Japan, the hikikomori and herbivore problems continue to cripple the current generation (to the point where the birthrate has fallen frighteningly) and in Korea similar societal issues and suicide rates are on the rise. In Japan specifically, the Democratic Party of Japan (DPJ)-led administration has called for a "shift from concrete to people" in response to the increasing awareness of these problems and the Sayama Psychological Institute has been doing many studies that recognize "underlying social withdrawal" as a prevalent issue in Japanese culture. All this because of communication restrictions? Absolutely. Without healthy communication there is very little room for healthy mental development intrapersonally or interpersonally for a variety of well studied and well documented reasons.

What does all this have to do with watching Asian drama? Simply stated ... It's becoming increasingly difficult for me to watch episode after episode of a given show where the "drama" is brought out not because of some intriguing plot element or multidimensional characterization but from strict cultural limitations on what can and can't be said or what can and can't be expressed. It's intriguing to me that most of the melodrama in Japanese drama (and some Korean) revolves around the characters' inability to communicate with one another in an open and honest way. In American television, lack of communication or miscommunication is usually used as a vehicle for comedy and in Asian drama it's used a vehicle for often painfully depressing melodrama. Doesn't that say something very distinct? Melodrama is a manipulative emotional journey meant to present the viewer with a specific and psychologically predictable emotional experience. The whole point is for you to settle into such experience with no barriers between you and the presented material. It's ironic that in most Japanese drama (and some Korean) that barrier is already there - pre-built into every character.

The recipe for most Asian drama is pretty simple:

Ingredients:
2 heaping cups of KYMSAS factor
1 dash of masking
1 handful of subjugation
1 cup self repression

Instructions:
Combine all ingredients in a large bowl.
Blend until painfully thick.
Bake at 400 degrees until ready to explode.
Eat until you cathartically cry.

Catharsis is a term in dramatic arts that describes the "emotional cleansing" occurring for one or more characters as well as the same phenomenon as an intended part of the audience experience. Usually in drama, the catharsis is some kind of emotional expression or outburst that's been sitting buried inside of one of the characters for 10 some odd episodes. I find most of my cathartic experiences in Asian drama to be slightly uninspiring usually because I've been screaming the whole time at the screen, "JUST OPEN YOUR MOUTH AND SPEAK FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!" and when the person finally does I'm just irked that it took so long and I don't feel better at all. I think I'm going to have a t-shirt created that says: Your Catharsis Doesn't Equal My Cathexis.

Now, the #1 rule of watching melodrama is "NO Projection". That is to say, you cannot project your own experiences or bias into what you are watching. While some melodrama absolutely relies on audience projection in order to manipulate them (i.e. knowing that everyone will probably respond to a drowning baby in the same exact way), for the most part you are supposed to be along for the ride in someone elses car and you have to experience the journey as a passenger in their world, in their terms, and most importantly within their limitations. Projecting tends to make the experience tainted. Like Neve Campbell said in Scream about being tired of watching the big breasted blond bimbo who should be running out the front door instead of running upstairs. Yes, we all know what the character SHOULD be doing. We all know that we WOULDN'T be doing what the character is doing. But the goal is to BE the character and not yourself when watching manipulative emotional media. IF you were this blond bimbo who doesn't have the brains to run out the front door wouldn't you be scared? If the answer is yes, then great! Experience communicated, enjoy the movie. If you're yourself in the experience bitching about how stupid the blond is and how you have no sympathy for someone who is going to run upstairs wailing instead of running outside then you're not going to enjoy anything or receive the correct emotional experience when she gets stalked and killed. The problem I am having is exactly this. My negative experiences with real world communication and my strong feelings about communication subjugation from a professional sociological and psychological standpoint are causing me to have a difficult time experiencing the presentation of melodrama in the proper way. I'm the passenger in someones car alright ... but for me the driver is drunk and blindfolded, swerving back and forth while going the wrong way on a multi-lane highway, and all I want is to get out.

It's hard not to bring my experience as a professional into everything I do. I analyze everything. But I used to be able to enjoy Asian drama and still put my own professional spin and vision on it in an entertaining way. Most of the emails I've received from the fanbase are about how interesting it is that I see certain aspects of drama in a unique way and how I've pointing things out to them that they never thought of before. That is what this blog was supposed to be all about. That is what I wanted to bring to the Asian drama community; a unique perspective as an American therapist watching Asian drama and all of the intriguing cultural and psychological observations and revelations that went along with that. This past year of personal Hell has altered my ability to do that effectively and positively and I owe everyone a ginormous apology accompanied by the deepest bow I can manage without my giant breasts getting in the way.

This blog, along with several other sites I will be debuting, will relaunch January 1st 2011. I have been downloading Asian dramas all this time, I just haven't been watching them. I have a lot of catching up to do but rest assured that I will be writing again in the new year hopefully with the same brand of sarcasm, humor, educational quality, and obnoxious elitism *laugh* that many of you guys have come to equally love and hate.

Thanks to everyone for their patience, words of encouragement, and support for the past year.

I will see you all in 30 days!